1. |
Pine Street
03:46
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it’s a slow hollowing out of experience
cutting back the wisteria
on the porch of the house i grew up in
sneak out the window / ash in the gutter
move in september keep coming back every summer
i never strain to remember / never been good at pretending
i always knew what I wanted but never knew how to get it
was sleeping thru adolescence i never planned for it ending
now I’m worried about making my parents proud
so embarrassed of the time i spent figuring out
i’m just scared to keep replaying the same sounds
and then everything comes crashing down
what am i learning looking back
it feels so long would you look at that
still feel so young baby thats a fact
i still feel crazy looking back
twelve am and I’m just leaving work
and I’m driving to pine street
you’re losing sleep just to see me
couple shots of tequila
in a mcdonald’s fanta
you keep asking me questions i don’t have any answers
now i’m worried bout what i never said allow
way too late to go back and figure this shit out
lie awake roll the same syllables around my mouth
and then everything comes crashing down
what am i learning looking back
it feels so long would you look at that
still feel so young long baby thats a fact
i still feel crazy looking back
what am i learning looking back
i feel so blue would u look at that
i been gone so long baby that’s a fact
i still feel crazy looking back
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2. |
Paradise Pond
04:51
|
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followed my friends as far as the walk would take
down to the river and back round to the lake
behind the college / but schools not in session
hand rolled smokes no one sees us swim
rode my bike down here when i got the call
cause he’d overdosed just after texting us all
i love you, make music forever
knew i’d see him again cause he woke up sweating
in the ambulance, or the hospital
pumped his stomach was out of school that fall
walked to the lake with his girlfriend
told me she wished she’d beat him to it
i felt so small
walked down here for the party
following your friends and they’d set up already
made it four beers in when the cops came
we went back to your dorm when everybody ran
rolled in your bed awake till early morning
but i never told you all these stories
gave you fragments but kept the best for myself
hard to feel homesick till everyone’s laid to rest
got the message from an old friend today
don’t tell you / don’t talk to you anyway
who cares if someone else is gone
close myself in keep on moving on
like the tape’s stuck on repeat
new pictures same old screen
like the way it’s always been
i feel the valley closing in
and i’m sewn into the hem
and i’m losing u again
like i’m chasing how i felt
before i felt like someone else
i keep thinking i’ll see old roommates at a red light
same honda’s same bumper stickers same license plates
make eye contact then look away real quick
drive the same streets I always did
meet the same people always thinking
one day i’ll be more like them
someday i’ll get better then
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3. |
Liquors 44
02:32
|
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you drive to the liquor store
you’re taking the long way round
like you don’t know where you’re going
like you haven’t been there before
you said i should be nicer
even to people you don’t know
i’m just talking behind their back
but you still think i could be kinder
i said that i quit smoking
i still keep a pack of camel blues on the windowsill
told me you should really get going
but you’re still undressed
pass out in the living room
you’re up at dawn in your too small bed
text me photos of the sunrise
i won’t act surprised when you’re sending them to somebody else instead
you say that i’ve had too much to drink
that’s ok you’re probably right
but if i was sober
would you still be coming over every friday night
we can hold ourselves together
with whispered prayers for what comes next
flicking ash out of the windows
giving all the world our our best
in the morning i’ll know better
in the morning i can rest
i don’t think when we’re together
i can finally hang my head
i don’t need somewhere to go to feel alright
i can feel alright at home if i’m with you
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4. |
North Maple
02:34
|
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sorry i was so incoherent
didn’t know what I wanted to say
shouldn’t have had so much to drink
shouldn’t have taken that pill before you came
i’m just hoping you can you can talk me down again
always knowing better but still live inconsistently
you leave my side as i’m leaving my body
can’t read your mind
looked like you’d been drinking,
glass eyes patient sinking,
last time i’d been inching,
closer to the part of you who
held out past your bedtime,
to see me knowing you’d find
i was spending my time
as if i was someone new
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Not Here Records
not here records is a hadley, mass label. founded 2015.
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